She looked at him as he scooted closer but turned her attention
back to her hands in her lap "Well...Something weird happened I
don't know how but...well it started with me and Kaien going to try
and get sam." She told him everything. How she tried to talk to him
leaving out that she had kissed him "So I thought to try and get to
the lab I don't know why but I was...I don't know what I was but I
wasn't focused.: She went on to tell him about the picture as she
pulled it out her pocket with blood all over it still. She then
told him about how she broke through the ground after hearing
someone yell "I thought..I thought I could've been you." She
reluctantly told him about killing the Creature and sam being
there. "I was still mad..at him but i was..I dont know merciful i
dont know! But for some reason I was over come with..anger I don't
know why it took over me I couldn't..I didn't have any control.."
She started to cry a little at the thought of possibly hurting one
of them but hid it and continued finishing the story. She just
looked down scared to see Rairu's face and expression "I brought
him here...For some reason..I don't know but he..calms me...Even
after all he has done...he does...Why I don't know but I need to
find out!" She stood up angry again "Why is this island Messing
with us! Why!?!" She stopped and breathed trying to calm down 'Stop
before something else happens'
Asuna looked up and saw sam she got really scared but remembered
that Rairu wasn't mad at him and if he was he kept it secret.
"Just..Sit there until you fall asleep." She looked back down
avoiding eye contact with both Rairu and Sam. 'Why is he torturing
me by saying nothing? "Say something! Don't just sit there!" She
was now standing up clinching her fists 'Settle down..settle down!'
She tried to tell herself but it wasn't working.
Asuna closed her eyes trying harder to calm down but it wasn't
working but when she opened her eyes and looked at Sam she calmed a
little. "..s..sorry.." She sat back down looking at her hands in
her lap close to the fire next to sam. 'Why now? Why not back when
we first started this stupid island.' She argued with herself In
her mind 'This could get worse...it could completely take over
again and I..
I could hurt one of them...' Anyone could see the sadness in her
eyes as she thought that.
Asuna watched him get up "Be careful where ever you are going." She
didn't have the energy to try and figure out where he was going
even though she should have.
"Daph...I honestly don't know what to do..I just know I don't want
any of you guys to get hurt! That isounds the number one thing."
She never took her eyes off the fire.
She looked up back to reality and heard Ryder "Oh uh..no I can get
him!" She said as she got up quickly running over to her house and
picked him up rocking him as she quietly said "It's ok..mommy's
here! I'm here!" As she shushed him to silence and smiled "All
better?" But she didn't put him down she just looked at him
smiling.
She didn't look away from Ryder "I hope he is...he has cried a lot
lately.." She said quietly to Rairu putting Ryder down in his crib
silently and stared smiling at him asleep and suddenly just got
another memory 'How are they still showing up!!' She closed her
eyes tightly trying to pay attention to the memory hoping it would
help give some clues. But it was just the boy that she remembered
when she first got here it was a little clearer but still blurry.
She opened her eyes and acted natural turning to Rairu "Sam still
gone?" She walked past him outside slowly closing the door to
Ryder's room.
She smiled at him "Just because you feel that way doesn't mean it
is true! And it isn't true! Yes we both almost got killed when you
first got here...but we are alive We figure a way to fix
everything! And you learned that people don't like having their
minds tampered with but still you learn more and if you are
learning then you aren't an idiot!" She leaned in front of him and
whispered "Plus Idiots wouldn't be able to A. Be able to help take
care of a baby and B.Wouldn't be able to read people's minds and
have awesome powers!!" She ruffed his hair and stepped back
smiling.
She stopped and laughed nervously "Nope not that I know of!!" She
didn't know if it was about what happened when her and Kaien went
after him or when she..freaked out but she sped up while she
talked..it was weird... "How would I know he never talks to me
anymore!! Yes I wish he did and wasn't so distant but I can't
control that now can I?!?!" She put her hand over her mouth and
then crossed her arms and rocked nervously. "Heh.."
She realized she was thinking out loud and he had no idea what
happened "Never mind..." She smiled widely "I was just saying...Sam
isn't the same really...well yet again none of us are..." She
rubbed her neck looking down.